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Sunday, August 11, 2013

Life on Pause... Kinda



My Facebook newsfeed is full of people getting married, engaged, finishing up masters degrees and having babies. It's a tad-bit depressing seeing the large number of people starting their lives as adults while I'm here laying on my bed studying for the MCAT with really no prospect of a future husband. My life has been consumed with school that every other aspect of my life has been put on pause.

I know that it's best for me to continue down this path, but right now in this moment I wish things were a little different. I would love to be done with school right now so then I would have a wonderful job that I love and make enough money to properly care for children. I would love to actually feel like I am an adult in the real world and not young woman who is still trying to figure herself out while attending school.
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Friday, June 28, 2013

Finally Compliant

It is now two weeks and 3 timing evaluations into my new job and I am finally compliant. In my first timing evaluation both my accuracy and spoken words per minute where below the minimum. In my second timing evaluation only my wpm was below the minimum. When I took the third evaluation both my accuracy and wpm were above the minimum.My error rate has been decreasing while my wpm have increase. Hopefully this continues and I start to plateau well above the bare minimum.

I am feeling b better about this job, I just need to remember that I am not perfect and will not be able to caption everything perfectly. I need to stop being so hard on myself!

Peace
       And
            Love
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Thursday, May 30, 2013

Good News

Hello Starlets!

I turned in an application last week to a company that is relatively new to my city and was called back for an interview. There were about five different tests that I had to take and even though I was nervous I did pretty well. After passing the tests I had the actual formal interview and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

The interview went well and I was offered the job! This is such wonderful news. The next open training session isn't until Monday June 17, however I was told that if an earlier one opens up then I can start then. I'm excited but I need to make sure that I show improvement every week of training otherwise I can be let go from the job

Once i graduate from training I can apply for another position within the company. Having the opportunity to be promoted so quickly is wonderful.

I can't wait to start. Now I am one step closer to fulfilling my goals.
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Wednesday, May 15, 2013

May 14 CVS Trip

Hi Starlets.

One thing that seems to always bring me joy is saving money. I ended up stopping by CVS yesterday and bought a few things.

I was able to get 5 pieces of toothpaste and 1 lipstick for $1.97 and got back $3 worth of CVS rewards (Extra Care Bucks = ECB). This has got to be my best shopping trip at CVS because everything was worth $18.35 before taxes.

1. Colgate Total was on a buy 1 get 1 free sale
2. Crest Twin Pack was going to give me back 3EBC
3. I scanned my ExtraCare Card and got a CVS coupon for $2 off $8 of Crest/Oral-B toothpaste/toothbrush so I took another Crest toothpaste to fulfill the requirement
4. A bought a lipstick because I needed $0.07 of a beauty product to be able to get 5 EBC from the Beauty Club

I had $11 worth of EBC from a previous trip so added with the $2 CVS coupon I saved $13 .... Technically saved $17.29 because one toothpaste I got for free. So now I have $17.29 that goes into my piggy bank to buy a DSLR camera. Click here if you would like to see a list of my saving/financial goals.
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Monday, May 13, 2013

Declutter Life

Hi Beautiful Starlets.

I hope you all are having a wonderful Monday morning.

I've been feeling a bit anxious this morning and I believe it's from not really knowing what I'm going to do with my life at this moment in time. I've entered a new phase in my life with no concrete prospects for the future.

This a major change in my life and I've been having some anxiety due to graduating. I've been in school for so much of my life so that is all I really know. I'm just trying to readjust to everything.

I took out the garbage this morning and it felt nice doing something different. I had 10 minutes of just being alone, walking in the cool Orlando breeze, and thinking. I realized that I need to declutter life and do things I don't normally do.

I've held on to so many things throughout my life and now I need to just LET GO! I have notes and folders from High School here with me in Orlando, and papers from Elementary school back home with my mother. Typing that sentence made me realize that I actually am a hoarder and I need to change that.

With this change in my life I need my surroundings to change as well, so I am starting with apartment. I've reorganized my apartment these past few months but it's time to actually declutter it. It will take a few months to get my home in the state that I want but it is very much needed.

I hope you will join me on this journey to decluttering life.
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photo credit: puck90 via photopin cc

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Swagbucks Search

I just earned my highest payout on swagbucks search. That actually sounds like this is a spam message but it isn't. I've been using swagbucks on and off for the past year or so and have been able to get $20 worth of amazon gift cards. Recently I've decided that I would start using swagbucks for often because I want to accumilate enough swagbucks to buy a sewing machine off of Amazon.

This month i have been able to get a few gift cards but I'll do an official recap at the end of this month. But just a few minutes ago I was able to earn 39 swagbucks, which has been my highest payout thus far. I've realized that the more you use the swagbucks search engine the higher your payout will be. I'm just excited because I'm even closer to getting my sewing machine!

Click here if you would like to signup for Swagbucks.
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Week 1 MCAT Review

Happy Sunday Beautiful Starlets!

I've decided that I will documenting my MCAT studying progress for every week. I will try to be consistent and review the previous week on every Sunday.

This past week wasn't a full week so I didn't get done what I would have liked to. Really I didn't get anything done.


The assignments for Week 1 were:
  1. Dr. Putzer Verbal Reasoning + Outline
  2. Practice Reading Comprehension on Journals
  3. AAMC 4 Verbal Passages
  4. Kaplan 3 Verbal
  5. Kaplan PT1 Verbal Passage II

What actually got done:

  1. I'm reading through the Verbal Reasoning Section of Dr. Putzer's MCAT Review Book for the second time and I realized that I already outlined this section. As I am reading I will look for different key points that I would like to add to my outline.
  2. I didn't practice any verbal reasoning passages because my printer ran out of ink so I was not able to scan and print a copy of the Kaplan Verbal Passages that were in the books that I checked out from my local library.
  3. I didn't practice any reading comprehension skills on journals. This week I will look for different articles that I can print out and read. 
********
KEY:
AAMC "#" Verbal Passages = All Verbal Passages from respective AAMC Practice Test
Kaplan "#" Verbal = All Verbal Passages from the respective Practice Test in Kaplan MCAT Verbal Reasoning Review 3rd Edition
Kaplan PT"#" Verbal Passage "#" = Respective Verbal Passage from respective Practice Test in Kaplan  MCAT Practice Tests 8th Edition
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Saturday, May 11, 2013

Feeling Good

Hello Beautiful Starlets!

Today was a good day. This morning I walked barefoot in Downtown Orlando! Crazy. Never thought that I would be able to do that. It was a walk to raise awareness about AIDS and Poverty in Africa. A young woman in the Central Florida area hosted "Take The Walk." For every person who participated in the walk the band Hanson will donate $1 to Blood:Water Mission. I'm not entirely familiarized with either Hanson or Blood:Water Mission but I decided to participate because they were going to sell REBUILD globally sandals at the event.

If you don't know I am an intern for the nonprofit organization REBUILD Globally. REBUILD Globally operates in Port-au-Prince, Haiti and hires Haitian's to repurpose tires and old leather into sandals. It's a wonderful organization and I believe in its mission. I wanted to show support for both causes so I walked, and also dragged my little brother with me.

It was a wonderful feeling knowing that something as simple as walking a mile around Downtown is having an impact on the lives of people on the other side of the pacific ocean. Maybe I was feeding my ego, but doing good really makes you feel good. It was a bit of revival in my humanitarian spirit. I know that I want to be the change that our world needs.... that Haiti needs.

I absolutely forgot how uncomfortable it is to walk barefoot. Sharp pebbles dig into your skin, the concrete is hot, and the ground is filthy. But walking barefoot allowed for me to get over myself. I only did that for a few minutes but there are thousands of people doing that everyday,
and in worst conditions than Downtown Orlando.

I challenge all of you to go out and make a difference in your community. People around the world are looking for someone and something to give them hope for another day. Be that HOPE!
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For more information about Take the Walk click here or visit www.takethewalk.net
For more information about REBUILD Globally click here or visit www.rebuildglobally.org

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

MCAT Study Prep

Hello Beautiful Starlets!

Now that I have graduated it's time to go hardcore on MCAT studying. Currently I'm making a list of review books and tests that I want to use and their costs. I wanted to take the MCAT in September, but until I get a job I don't see that happening. If I can't take it in September then I will have to sign up to take the first one in 2014, which I'm guessing will be sometime in January. Because I don't know when I will be able to purchase additional study material I won't be making a study schedule months in advance. As time progresses I will be make goals for the upcoming weeks. I know for the first month I will be working on creating flash cards using Dr. Putzer's MCAT Review Book and filling out the AAMC Content Outlines using my textbooks.

Here is a list of study material that I would like to use:

  1. Dr. Putzer's MCAT Review
  2. ExamKracker's 101 Verbal Reasoning Passages
  3. ExamKracker's 1001 Physics Questions
  4. ExamKrackter's 1001 Chemistry Questions
  5. ExamKracker's 1001 Orgo Questions
  6. AAMC Practice Test (ALL)
  7. Gold Standard CBT (ALL)
  8. TPR Online Diagnostic
  9. TPR Online Practice Test
There are some practice tests and books that I would be able use and check out from my local library. They aren't listed yet.
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Edit: Additional study material

  • Kaplan MCAT Verbal Reasoning Review Revised for 2013 -- Local Library
  • Kaplan MCAT Practice Tests 8th Edition -- Local Library

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Summer 2013 Bucket List

Hey Beautiful Starlets.

I've been working on a summer bucket list and finally finished it. This is a list of things that I would like to do since I've graduated college. I might not finish the entire list this summer but I would like to have it done by the end of the year.

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photo creditesther** via photopin cc
Edited with: http://pixlr.com/editor/ 

Monday, April 29, 2013

Goals

Hello Beautiful Starlets!

I have come up with a few financial goals that I want to achieve and I want to share them with you.
  1. Get a job after college
  2. Pay off my undergraduate student loans as quickly as possible
  3. Save up to buy a sewing machine .................................................... Cost: $119.99
  4. Save up to buy a DSLR camera .......................................................Cost: $600
  5. Save up money for medical school ................................................... Cost: $300,000
  6. Save up to buy my first house cash in the next 10-15 years ................Cost: $200,000
  7. Save up to pay for my wedding in the next 20-25 years..................... Cost: $30,000

How will I be doing this?
Sewing Machine
In order to save up for the sewing machine I will be using swagbucks. For every 450 swagbucks I accumulate I will be able to redeem a $5 amazon gift card. I have been using swagbucks on and off for the past year or so and have already obtained $20 worth of amazon gift cards, so I know this isn't a scam. It will take a long time, but I'm willing to wait since I'm not currently working at the moment.

DSLR Camera
In order to save up for the DSLR Camera I will be using coupons. Everything that I save from using coupons will go to saving for the camera. 

Loans, Medical School, House, and Wedding
I'm not entirely sure how I will save up enough for these but I know that I must get a job. Whatever job I get most likely will not pay enough so that I will be able to do all of this but at least it is something until after I'm a doctor. As for my wedding, I do not plan on getting married in 20 years. If I get married I would like for it to be in the next few years but I want it to be smaller. My dream wedding will cost more than what I can afford so I would rather it be during a milestone in our relationship.

I am preparing myself to go into debt for med school because there is no way that I will be able to save up that much money. But whatever I am able to save up will go towards paying it off. 


These are very high ambitions and I most likely won't be able to fulfill them in the time frame mentioned. But they are goals to work towards. Why try if it won't be a challenge? As time progresses I'll keep you updated on how everything is going financially. So Starlets, if you have any financial goals share them with me so we can support one another.
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Sunday, April 28, 2013

Happy Anniversary!

Dear Starlets,

April 28th is a very important day in my life. Today marks 23 years of living in the United States and I'm so happy! No matter what people may feel about the U.S. I am still proud to call myself an American. I have been given a chance to make a better life for myself. It will be difficult but I know that I will be able to succeed.

If it wasn't for my Grandmother (or God working through her) I, nor my mother, would be here in the U.S. She worked endlessly in the fields to save up money to send both of us to the United States, and I will be forever grateful. She gave us an opportunity and because of her my future children will have an opportunity.
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Saturday, April 27, 2013

Reoccurring Dream

Hi Starlets!

Earlier this month I wrote about a dream where a group of people were trying to kill me. Well I think that I am having a reoccurring theme in my dreams. (You actually don't have to read this. I'm just documenting my dreams to review later).

This time I met a Caucasian man who was considerably older than me in church, or a church event. Somehow I was able to get a list of the classes we would be taking in the next few semesters and they were difficult classes. I personally love smart guys so I was starting to like him. At some point he asked me to have dinner with him. But first I asked my cousin would it be fine with her if I had him over for dinner and she basically said yes.

We were sitting down talking and for some reason he got up and started covering parts of the tiled window with napkins. I got up also but that was because my mother was there and kept talking. She basically kept saying that it wasn't a good idea to have this man in my home. My old female Praise Team Director also appear basically saying the same thing. In my head I was telling myself that I would have never allowed him to come by if I would have been alone. I soon got agree with my mother and yelled that I asked my cousin first if it was fine with here. (NOTE: All the conversations with my mother were in Haitian-Creole, while the conversations with my praise team director were in English).

When me an the man, I forgot his name, were talking he said something about going to a school in Kentucky and he hated it. Then later on his male friend, who also just appeared, said something about him wanted to go to Medical School. He asked where exactly is LECOM and I answered in Bradenton, Fl. I asked my date a few questions about Med School and he would answer them either arrogantly or would tip toe around the answer because he didn't know. This should have been suspicious, but I didn't realize until he was trying to kill me.

How date ended, and when he was home he had a machine in his pantry that would talk to him and give him his straws. He loved drinking with those straws but he told the machine that the drink he was drinking would have been so much better if he had killed me and then he vowed that he would kill me. Somehow I was in his home and I heard this so I ran upstairs and tried to figure out a way to get out. It took me a while, because as you can see I am very detailed, so I kept thinking that he would figure out what I would do and be waiting for me where ever I went.

Somehow I got out and ended up diving in trash and under a home to try to hide. He found the spot where I was hiding. As he was looking for me a young man of African decent, possibly in High School, walked out and saw him. He beat the child to death by punching him and slamming his head against a silver car that was parked. Then he ran off and the entire neighborhood walked out to see him leaning against the car bloody and dead.

But my mind flipped it, and made him alive and this time he was a woman who was of Hispanic decent. She told the group of people that she saw me under the house and that the man was looking for me. She changed my name and went on to tell a store about how I wanted to kill myself. Then my mind jumped to a narrative and asked why did the young lady change my name? I thought it was to protect me from the man because if he was still around he would think that he followed the wrong person. Someone from the group answered and said that the name represented her because she wanted to kill herself for all the reasons she mentioned. He asked the narrator did she actually go through with it, and the voice said yes.


This is basically were my dream ended. I have no idea why I'm having dreams about people trying to kill me. I have no idea what theses dreams actually mean, but they are starting to freak me out. Last time I had reoccurring dreams about death my grandmother died. I know that it might sound weird to some of you, but sometimes my dreams tell me the future or reveal things about the people in my life. I know these dreams mean something, I just don't know what.
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Monday, April 8, 2013

I Cooked Haitian Food!

Good morning Beautiful Starlets!!

This past Saturday I spent the morning cooking a Haitian dish for the first time. It was basmati rice, Legim Militon, and Sos pwa blan; it actually came out really good.

Legim militon is basically veggies. The main ingredients are eggplant, chayote, cabbage. You boil the veggies down, mash them and then add it to the meat you are cooking. My mom uses beef and sometimes crab, so I have no idea how it would taste with other types of meat. I used beef stew chunks and oxtail and seasoned them the light before.

To cook the beef you add some oil to a large pan and then place the oxtail on the bottom and the beef chunks on top. The meat will produce it's own sauce to boil in. Keep adding water if you see that the sauce is getting low. Additional things to add are rosemary, thyme, chopped spinach, bell pepper, scotch bonnet pepper, and any other seasonings you have on hand. Once the meat is done cooking you add the mashed veggies.

Sos pwa blan basically translates into "White bean sauce." I used 1.5 cups of Great Northern Beans that I let soak the night before. I replaced the water, added some green onions, and boiled the beans until they can be easily squished with my figures. In a blender I added some rosemary and thyme and then the bean and water mixture. (You don't have to use a blender but it makes the mashing process a bit quicker. If you are going to use a blender then you should let the beans cool down... I learned the hard way. LOL). Once everything is blended well add the bean mixture into a the pan you boiled it in. (My personal preference is to wash it first). Add a can of coconut milk, one maggie cube and other seasonings, and let cook together.

It took me four hours to cook this plus however long it took me to prepare everything the night before. Haitian food takes so long to cook but it tastes wonderful at the end.

I know the photograph isn't the best but it will have to do until I am able to get a camera. Once I have a great camera I will be able to have cooking tutorials.

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Tuesday, April 2, 2013

People Are Trying To Kill Me

Dear Starlets,

People are trying to kill me..... well in my dreams they are. For a while now I have been dreaming about people hunting me down so that they could kill me and the latest installment was last nights dream. The only thing different was that now the dream involved my brother and cousin, I think because we live together now.


Here's the dream:
When I came home for some reason there were police officers outside my apartment guarding. I went inside and after sometime passed I told my brother that I was going to go for a walk because I was upset about something. I hear someone on the phone, I believe it was a police officer, say something like "Don't let her go! Keep her in the house!" The officer was urging my brother to not let me leave the house and I didn't know why.

When I tried closing the front door back it wouldn't close. The door was getting stuck on something and I could hear people outside yelling and running to my apartment. So I frantically tried closing the door and it finally was able to close and I locked it.

I looked outside the window and saw a group of men standing in the parking lot, they had weapons but I didn't know what they were. There might have been about 3 or 4 men of Caucasian decent and maybe one man that was of African decent, but I kind of doubt that because of what they were saying. These men were yelling out racial slurs and derogatory terms toward females and they really wanted to kill me. I have no idea why or what I did to make them so angry but they were so angry that they stood outside my apartment for hours yelling and saying that they were going to kill me.

My brother and cousin were in the house with me and I tried protecting them and putting them in a safe place so that if the men started shooting at us they would be safe. I tried hiding them in the kitchen and my bathroom but for some reason that didn't work and they didn't want to stay. I don't think they actually understood what was going on because I kept yelling at them to not stand in front of the window and crawl around the apt if they had to go to another room.

I wanted to call the police but I couldn't because my cellphone wasn't working. It was like these men had figured out some way to interfere with my phone line and not get it to work and cut off the electricity in my apartment, but for some reason the ceiling fans were still working. Throughout the dream I was thinking to myself and trying to figure out why were the police officers not outside my door anymore.

At some point my cousin wasn't around, I think she might have been in the living room, and my brother and I were hiding in my room. I was hiding in the space between my bed and wall while my brother was on my bed. I kept telling him to get off the bed and come into this space, but he took forever to actually do what I said. I heard a type of noise and in the corner of my eye I saw a car outside a window that was behind me. Somehow these men were able to jack up the car to the third floor. I knew these men were in the car and they had guns, so I took my brother into my bathroom so we could hide.

At this point I told myself to wake up because I knew it was a dream and I didn't want to know what would happened next because we got so close to the end. I don't think my mind would have actually let me die but I didn't want to know what these men would try doing next to me and my family.


I'm not too sure what this dream means so if any of you want to give an interpretation you are free to do so. Also, comment below about any crazy dreams you've had.
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Monday, April 1, 2013

Ghetto???

So very easy for a dark skinned black girl to look ghetto.

I hate the fact that if I decide to wear my hair in a colorful style or if I get a lip piercing I will automatically be seen as ghetto or "trying to be white." Different races and ethnicities have different norms, but deviating from those norms to that of other cultures doesn't mean you are trying to be like someone else... you are just being true to yourself. Most people think that just because I'm dark skinned I can't wear color and I believed that as a child. I never wore pink or purple lipstick until I got to Junior year of High School and now I love it.

The popular misconception is that the fairer your skin is the more you can do with color. IT SUCKS! I feel like if any dark skinned girl tries to cross those lines she is seen as a ghetto bunny. I know that certain colors go best with certain skin tones but we shouldn't have to fear experimenting because we will be judged by the world. If I wanted to wear blonde hair then I am sure that I could pull off blonde hair, I would just have to find the right tone of blonde that would complement my skin. It's all about balance.

One of my goals after graduation is to not fear what the world will say about the way I look. I realize that I will never please everyone but I know that I can try pleasing myself. It's time to let this Sapfire out for the world to see.

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Saturday, March 30, 2013

Girl Crush

Hello Beautiful Starlets!

How are you all doing this Saturday morning? I'm not asking just to ask, I really do have an interest in how you are feeling.

This past week I was just surfing the internet came across a photographs of Alexa Chung. She is beautiful and I've developed a girl crush on her for the past two years. I loved her when she had her MTV show It's On with Alexa Chung, but my crush did not start to develop until after the show was cancelled. I think she is absolutely beautiful with a down to earth personality.

As I got a little older and my style started changing I realized that Alexa Chung had become one of my style icons. My style has not completely evolved to where I would like for it to be because I'm a broke college student, but her style has been one of the many that I've gravitated towards.

Screenshot majed by Alexa Chung

Screenshot majed by Alexa Chung
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Tuesday, March 26, 2013

They Have to be Wrong

Hello Beautiful Starlets!

I hope the majority of you had a good day. I say majority because I know that in reality not everyone would have a wonderful day no matter how much a would hope you all did. My hormones got the best of me today so I've been very anti-me all day.

But anyways. The purpose of this post is a video I found on JR Bourne's twitter page (@iamjrbourne). It is a spoken word about bullying. This has been such a hot topic and rightfully should be. Gone are the days where we as adults can over look the way our children are treating others. And I call them our children because they are our children. We may not be raising them but they hold the future of mankind in their hands and we must show them what is clearly right from what is clearly wrong.

Different moments in this video stuck out to me for various reasons. I really hope that it evokes some type of emotion in you. It may agree with mine and it may not, but I want to know who you full on the subject matter of bullying, psychological disorders, and the other points mentioned. Just remember to be respectful.
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Sunday, March 24, 2013

Azonto

Hello beautiful stars!

How are all of you doing? Well I hope. This past week has been quite interesting... there was almost a mass murder at my university. I actually won't be writing about that just yet. I actually wanted to share with you an African dance that I found on Youtube, instead of writing my 10 page paper. I'm not African but I fell in love with the dance and the video. This has gotten me interested in the Haitian dance culture and I would love to find it. Enjoy. BTW, the dance is called Azonto.
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Still trying to figure out how she was able to dance in that dress without a wardrobe malfunction. 

Saturday, March 16, 2013

i Of The Sapfire???

i Of The Sapfire..... interesting title isn't it? Though confusing, this title sums up exactly the purpose of this blog.... Documenting my life.

That might sound a bit conceded ... like "who wants to know about your life?" Great question and I can't give you an exact answer. Most people won't give a flying monkey about who I am or what I have to say, while others might. I'm more writing for myself, documenting life and my experience living as a Haitian girl in the United States, and maybe along the way something I say might be of encouragement.

In just a two months I will be entering a new phase in my life.... The real world. I'm graduating college with a Bachelor's of Science in Biology, two minors in Health Science and Nonprofit Management, and a certificate in Nonprofit Management. Ohh, and did I mention I'm working on being a doctor too? These next few years are going to be quite interesting, and possibly a lot more stressful than my entire undergraduate career. I will have to deal with the stress of studying for the MCAT and decided exactly what to do with the rest of my life.

This blog is basically going to be about:
Life through the eyes of a young Haitian Woman who is balancing being Haitian, American, and a Women in opposing cultures.
I'll post about anything that peaks my interest. It might be about my sense of fashion, relationships in general, future advancements and goals, cooking, Haitian culture, or anything else my heart desires.


Meaning:
i = eye
  • life through my eyes (get it.... I'm a dork so you'll have to get used to it)
sapfire = sapphire
  • my birthstone. The weird spelling?... I don't feel as though I fit into any standard group of people so the spelling encompasses that feeling. You'll learn soon enough what I mean.
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